How do I find love in L.A.?
Our beloved Los Angeles holds so much, has been holding so much — especially as of late. Among the pain, anger and fiery impulse to act and defend our communities in the face of injustice, there are moments of togetherness, respite, joy. All of these emotions stem from love. It has always been this way. In a city like ours, we’re often compelled to act from passion. But how often do we allow ourselves the time to sit with those feelings, observe them, notice them?
L.A.’s “laid-back” reputation sometimes seems ironic. Sure, there are the serendipitous weekday afternoons spent by the pool, the slowed-down pace that the desert heat in the thick of summer compels us to adopt for somatic survival, the times when traffic only allows us to get one errand done and call it a day. And then, in contrast, there is the blur of lights on the 101 after rush hour is over, the fires to put out (both literally and figuratively), the family-run dry cleaners that somehow stay open seven days a week. Sometimes we are allowed the time to notice. Sometimes we aren’t. But when we are, do we take the opportunity?
The first step to calling more love into your life is to believe in your heart that love is abundant and everywhere. If you believe love is a goal, a destination, something to be found instead of just felt in stillness and chaos and everything in between, you’ll never feel whole. Commit yourself to the practice of observing and documenting love, wherever and however you may see it. Documentation not just in your mind, but on paper, can help you acknowledge any signs from the universe and thus encourage more of them to appear — this is a practice of word magic, of honoring synchronicity, of manifestation. Practice exposure therapy — when you see a smitten couple engaging in a sweet moment, don’t look away out of shame or jealousy. Allow yourself to feel that same sweetness in your heart, knowing that with every morsel of happiness that any one human experiences, the entire vibration of the planet is raised. Because infinite delicacies of the happiness of love are accessible to you, too, and everywhere, and always. Notice how the tía waiting for the bus to South Bay with arms full of groceries still moves everything aside so an abuelo can sit on the bench. Wait by a jacaranda tree long enough to see a petal flutter to the ground. Cook a nourishing meal for a new friend that you might have met at a.m. a couple weeks ago but want to get to know better.
As you not just notice but create moments of romance, passion and connection in your own life, you affirm your existence as a romantic, passionate and connected being — you move in love, you are love. Commit to believing this deeply enough, and you’ll feel more peace than you’ve ever known. And when your next lover appears, exactly when they’re supposed to, as they always do (as they always, always do), your life will already be so full of love that you’ll find your grotto has turned into a waterfall.
Goth Shakira is an Aquarian Queen of Pentacles divining and loving in Los Angeles. Send your questions to our resident love expert here.
